I owe an apologize to every person on deviant art.  I have not been as active as I promised to be, and I have let hundreds of people down, in my group and in general.  I have made a thousand promises to be active, but the truth is, I haven't even attempted to try and keep those empty promises I made.  I can't apologize enough, I can't regret enough, I can't ask for forgiveness enough.

Last year I was so active, so full of life and so very alive.

After August 20th, 2011, the light in my life slipped through my fingers and it shattered into a thousand pieces on the ground and it set the house of inspiration on fire.  I could clearly see it now, I had many things to make pictures about, but I couldn't get near to it without burning to a crisp myself so I did the only logical thing.

I ran away.

I ran away from art I ran away from reality, I drowned myself in the nearby river of depression and sadness.  But I merely fell asleep.  And somewhere between then I live a life of a waking nightmare, never sure when I was awake or when I was only dreaming.  But when I made the hardest decision to scream out for someone to hear, I couldn't believe it when I felt a hand wrap around my wrist.  My eyes flew open but the water distorted the view.

They told me I was awake, they told me I was alive.

Once more, the told me that my house was still on fire, tentatively, I tried to pull myself out of the water, but I slipped back beneath.  I keep trying, it may take months, it may take years, but I will pull myself out of the river and enter the house of flames.

My dreams are on fire and I can see them more clearly than before.

But do I dare enter?  Do I dare risk everything?  Do I?

There is only one answer...

Yes.